Life is Difficult
Thanks to Scott Peck for this one from the first page of his book, The Road Less Traveled. (In fact I was so blown away with this insight, that I didn’t bother reading the rest of the book.)
Some things are my problem and some not my problem.
Partly this has to do with shedding thoughts about what other people ought to be doing. It’s about trying to deal with things that I might not like but which I cannot practically influence. And on the other hand, focusing on the things where I can make a difference.
It’s not about me.
This is largely a realization that I think about things that have little to do with me as if they did. I’ve been involved in some conflict lately and had to make some decisions about what to do, or not to do. Whether to “make a statement” by doing something. The insight that “it’s not about me” helped me realize that I don’t need to make statement just to stake out a position, to position myself on the side of the angels or to capture the moral high ground. What I should do is do the best for everyone involved, because it’s not about me.